Phonecall to Maia

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"Look, I don't care if you're carrying the cure for the common cold, you are not getting onto this station any faster!"

Ivanova was scowling at her console.

The rest of the CnC crew were staying a safe distance away as the captain of the research craft, obviously new to the area, responded.

"Let me repeat myself. If you, or any craft you choose to sacrifice, comes anywhere close to this station or tries to cut off another ship without my express permission, I will open fire on your ship, have you arrested and brought aboard and then the fun really begins. Am I understood?"

Radio silence.

A very, very tiny assent.

"Good. Babylon Control out." She looked at Corwin. "Who's next?"

"Uh, we had a message come in on a private channel for you a while ago," Corwin said, glancing at his data pad. "I didn't recognise the code or the sender so I wasn't sure what to do with it. It's sitting on the system for you when you have a minute."

"Well, I have a minute now," Ivanova sighed, tapping a few keys on her console to bring up the message, barely audible over the crackling static and the background noises of the bridge. Her face went carefully blank and she whirled on her heel, stalking out of CnC without a backward glance.

"Captain?" Corwin gulped, starting after her.

"I have to get down to the planet," she replied shortly. "You're in charge. Don't start any shooting wars we can't win while I'm gone." And then she was gone, leaving three angry captains, a queue for the docking bays, and a trembling lieutenant.

***

Zathras took one look at her face and decided to forgo his usual chatter as he led her to the Great Machine. It was getting easier to control this thing, but she barely noticed.

"Maia, I'm here."

Comments

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia looked up from her place on her bed. "Susan." Her voice cracked a little. "Come get me. Please, please can you just come and get me."

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova crouched beside the bed, even though she couldn't do more than that. "What happened?" she asked, already calculating what would be needed to get Maia away from Fandom, and wondering if she could do it with the Great Machine alone.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"Paige is leaving, your gone. I- I can't be here anymore Susan. I tried, I've been trying so hard and I can't do it. I miss you so much." Maia swiped at her tears, her eyes drinking in the form of Ivanova, God why couldn't she just appear solid in front of her and not be just an image.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

That threw Ivanova more than a little off-balance. "But . . . Maia, I thought you liked Fandom. Even if we're gone . . ." She shook her head. No. She wasn't going to tell Maia what to think any more. "Paige is leaving?"

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia nodded "She has to go with her Gran", sniffling a little Maia spoke again, "I do but I- can you just take me away for a little while then?" Maia said looking at Ivanova waiting to hear her answer.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova hesitated. As soon as the thought crossed her mind the Machine began helpfully providing solutions, many of them breaking several laws of physics as well as her brain.

She bit her lip, unsure what to say.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia swallowed, her breathing was catching every other breath or so as she tried to stop crying.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova was generally very bad at comforting other people. Especially crying females. More so when she couldn't even pat them on the back comfortingly. Or, in Maia's case, pull her into her arms and hold her until the badness went away. So she just hovered, uncomfortable.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia pulled her knees up under her chin, her tears fell less rapidly now; she felt the need to wipe them away less and less. She watched Susan, swallowing down the hurt that apparently Susan didn't think Maia coming for even a few days was a good idea, she was able to keep calming herself.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova was still remembering all too well what had happened last time Maia had come for a few days. She sat on the edge of the bed, the hologram not disturbing the covers at all.

"Are you going to be alright?" she asked finally, not knowing what else to say.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia nodded. "Aren't I always." She said with a sigh, it was not an attempt at being humorous. "I'm sorry I bothered you." She said quietly, embarrassment started filtering over her. "I-I didn't know who else to call..." She trailed off as she took her eyes off Ivanova for the first time since her arrival in the room.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova shook her head quickly. "No, no you weren't bothering me. I wasn't doing anything important." she lied thrugh her teeth. "You can always call. Whenever you need me."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia nodded, but I want so much more then to just call you Susan don't you see that? "Ok." She said with a nod, her heart felt a sharp pain at Ivanova's words that she could call.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"Okay," Ivanova echoed, looking down at her hands. Maia needed her and she had absolutely no clue what to do. Talk about feeling useless.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia sat quietly, blinking slowly for a moment or two she finally spoke. "I guess I should let you go. I don't want to keep you from anything important. I know there is always something going on up there." She said, she forced the hopelessness out of her voice of ever getting to go with Susan or touch Susan again. The last time they had talked she had felt Susan's lips brush against her forehead but then maybe she had imagined it.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"I was really worried when I got your message," Ivanova blurted out. "I came as soon as I could, really. I . . . I just don't know how I can help."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia looked a little surprised by Susan's burst of words at her. For a moment she was speechless. "I- I didn't mean to worry you. I just-" Maia paused choosing her words carefully. "I needed to see you, just be near you. I'm all alone and you're the person who can make that feeling go away for me..." Maia swallowed hard shutting herself up now.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

The need to block herself off, to remind Maia that she was alone now, that Ivanova wasn't around, warred with the need to protect her damsel from any more distress.

It all came out in a sigh. "Maia . . ."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia looked at her, fear of rejection flashing into her eyes. "It's ok Susan." She said quietly. "I'll be ok." Her heart felt like it would shatter at any moment. "I just- I just wanted to see you." She barely whispered out the words.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova smiled softly, a bit lopsided, a lot awkward. "You'll always see me when you really need it," she said, before tampering the promise. "Or, I'll try . . . which isn't much of a promise, but it's the best I can do." She raised her hand, curving it around Maia's cheek without touching, the hologram wavering a bit where it would have met skin.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia closed her eyes, she imagined the touch for a moment before opening her eyes to blink away the blur from the tears. "I always take what I can get where your concerned." She said in a soft voice.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Way to make a girl feel lower than low.

"You shouldn't have to settle," she growled, angry more at herself. "For me or for anything."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"It's not settling when it's what you want." She said aching to be able to reach out to her. "I want what you can give me and if all you can give me is this, then I'm happy because it's what I want."

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova shook her head, but she was smiling now. "Your logic is strange and convoluted. But I gave up telling you what to do, remember?"

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"I do." Maia said returning the smile for the first time since they had been speaking. "It might be strange and convoluted, but it makes sense to me." She said smiling a little wider.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova was taking any smile as a victory. Her own grew equally wide. "As long as it makes sense to you, I guess it's alright with me."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"Does you not telling me what to do apply to everything?" Maia said an idea suddenly striking her.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Uh oh. ". . . yes, I suppose it would have to."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia bit her lip and then set about what she was planning on saying. "Then will you have Zathras come get me?" Maia said keeping her tone as brave as she could unsure if Ivanova would explode or not at the request.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"Technically that's telling Zathras what to do," Ivanova hedged desperately.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"True but, your his commanding officer. So technically, it's in your job description, but if you don't want to tell him what to do, you could ask him?" Maia felt a little bit of her bravery slipping away. "I won't go into the Zocalo." She added quickly. More and more of her bravery was slipping away as she looked at Susan.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova sighed, running a hand through her hair. "And I'm not really his commanding officer. Zathras doesn't have a CO." Yep, she was still hedging like a mad thing. "But . . . maybe I can get one of the security guys to keep an eye on you . . ."

See this? This is Ivanova wavering. It doesn't happen very often.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Hope soared into Maia's heart, swallowing it down she nodded. "That would be ok." She said in agreement "Or if they are busy I could stay in the quarters." She said in an effort to be helpful.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

So help her, Ivanova was already reorganising her schedule to open up the weekend. Still, she hesitated for a further moment before nodding. "I'll send him for . . . tomorrow is Friday there, right?"

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia nodded, not letting herself believe the words.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

Ivanova sighed. "This is a bad idea on so many levels, I hope you realise that."

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia bit her lip in a smile as she beamed up at Susan. "Yes it is." She nodded still smiling up at her. "But I want to do this." She said feeling brave again.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

The only reason Ivanova was agreeing to this was because if Paige really was leaving, Maia would need something to distract her.

"It'll be good seeing you again," she said honestly.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia smiled happily and nodded. "It will be really nice. When, when can he come for me?" Maia said trying to keep from bouncing off the bed in excitment.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"Sometime in the afternoon. I hope. Zathras has a rather . . . loose concept of time."

The more Ivanova thought about this, the more she knew that this was a Bad Idea.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"I'll be ready. In the park yes? Like last time?" Maia hoped it would be in the morning rather then the afternoon. She wanted every possible moment with Ivanova she could grasp.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"Yes, the park." It suddenly dawned on Ivanova that Maia was coming to see her. Which meant there would probably be . . . Maia-and-Ivanova-type things going on. There hadn't been much of that since she had left.

As a Jew, she was completely qualified for her mental Oy.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

"I'll be ready." Maia said, another smile flashing across her face. Paige was leaving and she would have to deal with that when she returned but for right now. Right in this moment she was going to see Susan again and that made her happy.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"I have to get back to the station," Ivanova said regretfully. "But I will see you tomorrow, definitely." A small smile played around the corner of her mouth at the thought.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia nodded. "Tomorrow then." She said, her voice near ecstatic. She hoped Susan would be with Zathras but if not, it would just be a couple hours and she would be with her.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

Maia nodded. "Tomorrow then." She said, her voice near ecstatic. She hoped Susan would be with Zathras but if not, it would just be a couple hours and she would be with her.

[suzotchka.livejournal.com]

"Then it's back to the salt mines with me," Ivanova said dryly. "See ya." And then she vanished.

[maias-notebook.livejournal.com]

It didn't break Maia to watch Susan vanish this time, her skin was practically humming with excitment. Tomorrow, she was going to see her tomorrow, be able to touch her skin, kiss her. Hold her. Sleep next to her and wake up feeling Ivanova's arms around her. Maia practically melted into the bed.